Tuesday, 21 August 2007

Time Space Bombshell

A highly respected but anonymous scientist has declared that the mysterious cosmic battery which runs the time element of the universe has started to fade in strength, & so time has begun to slow down. The scientist claims that the rate of time has actually fluctuated through the history of time but because of our existence within time, we have not the required vantage point from outside time with which to view these sometimes considerable fluctuations, & so time appears as a constant. The same scientist claims that the universe also undergoes spatial fluctuations where everything increases or decreases simultaneously in perfect ratio, but naturally again noone notices. He claims his findings are infallibly proven by his mathematical equations. When asked what implications these respective bombshells might have on humanity, he replied, "None that I can think of."
Incidentally, one astute commenter has wondered if there is a danger of the battery which runs time eventually corroding & leaking, thus infecting the universe it has been serving so well. Some of our finest minds have set themselves to investigating what might be the effects of such a toxic spillage.

2 comments:

Crystal said...

Is this anything like http://www.timecube.com/? ;)

I saw this crazy old man speak at MIT a few years back. Highly entertaining.

Andrew said...

The man's a genius, though I have my suspicions he's really only putting on an act to hide his snot-brain.